Re: marriage literature

Dear Noemi,

I know poeple have discouraged you from this marriage, and I am sure it is hard for you because you must love this man, or you would not contemplate marriage. I had a good friend who was in a relationship with a muslim man. She became pregnant. The first week he was "proud" of his accomplishment, but his muslim friends told him he would be crazy if he took responsibility for the child. He saw the sin as all the woman's fault and did not see himself as bearing any responsibility for it. He and and friends would taunt her as she went to class. She was so relieved she has a girl, because she knew he would have less interest in a female child than a male one.

If you were a committed muslim and he were a committed muslim, then you could be happy. However, if you are not he will probably try to control you once marriage begins. If you two have been intimate before marriage, he will treat you as his "whore" for the rest of your life. It is sad, but he must be true to his culture. Now you must ask yourself if you are going to be true to you faith and culture.

I wish you a happy life, no matter what you decide.

Anastasia